It's been almost a month since I've blogged. To make up for the gap (I know you've all been struggling to eek out some normalcy in a world without my posts) I'm going to celebrate the Royal wedding with a week of wedding related posts. Here goes:
In general I'm not the kind of parent who gets all worked up about my daughter being influenced by tv, books, movies. I take the stance that, while I am discerning about what goes into her head, my influence as a parent far outweighs what she hears and sees from other sources. I'm a pretty open and honest parent. I don't use cutesy names for anatomy, I answer questions directly (and sarcastically), etc. But one thing that I have noticed lately is how our society cultivates a little girls dream of becoming a bride....as though that is where the story ends.
Within the last 48 hours I have read over a dozen books to my daughter that close with the phrase and they lived happily ever after. At the drop of a tiara my daughter will grab anything resembling a bouquet of flowers, use a blanket as a makeshift train and play bride. Take a moment and ask the closest unmarried young woman about her wedding (whether she is engaged or not) and you'll likely get a 27 minute tutorial about flower arrangements, dress options and reception venue selection. It's insane. It seems that from the moment our girls can identify their vagina (yes, I used the real word...get over it) they've mentally begun taking their first steps down the aisle.
But do you notice how no one ever talks about their dream of being a wife? The fantasy seems to end after the 'I do'. And therein lies the problem. We don't ever hear about a young girls plans to be a supportive and productive spouse....how she has planned for every detail of her special role.....how she's prepared to spend decades as an encouraging companion. Is it more fun to be princess for a day than partner for a lifetime? Not if you ask me. It's all about perspective. There's nothing wrong with having a special day so long as it is the beginning, not the end, of your happily ever after.
True that!
ReplyDeleteTotally agree. I'm pretty much amazed by how many of my friends are dying to get married, but are unwilling to do things like cook, clean, or otherwise contribute... whereas that's one of my priorities at the end of every day. I'm adamant that I'm going to make sure that's done - whether I have a meeting or anything else... It's that important to me.
ReplyDeleteI like the end of your post... "It's the beginning, not the end, of your happily ever."
Thanks ladies.
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